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The Kinsey Institute repurposes and discusses 2017 data from the CDC, which says the average age of “first intercourse” (more on what that means later) in men is 16.8, while women, on average, have intercourse for the first time at 17.2.The Jacobs Institute of Women’s Health corroborates this data, though it simplifies the number and says most Americans, as we did in the 1960s, first have sex around age 18.It sucks to police the attempts of a marginalized group to define its own experience, but once orgasms are introduced into the virginity equation, things get even stickier.In 2014, the Journal of Sexual Medicine reported that less than 63 percent of women experience orgasms with familiar partners.When the concept was coined, it was a metric by which men could judge the worth of a woman — if she was a virgin, she’d fetch a higher dowry for her hand.Now that the transactional nature of marriage between a man and a woman’s father has changed, no one’s entirely sure what to make of virginity.That explains why the casual sex rate at retirement homes is reportedly through the roof.More confusing data emerged from that Kinsey Institute study: 11 percent of the survey respondents didn’t consider an act “sex” if the man involved didn’t have an orgasm. Oh yeah, in 2016 that queer women tend to define the loss of virginity with whether one has experienced an orgasm with the help of a partner.
The difference in our sexual experience made me feel like I was humiliatingly behind — was I supposed to be familiar enough with sex to prefer some acts over others?
One girl turned suddenly toward our group, clearly annoyed with our naiveté.
“Just don’t let him put it in your butt,” she practically spat.
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Unlike previous generations, however, we don’t tend to marry the first person we have sex with, and we continue having sex at varying rates until our late twenties, when the majority of young Americans who get married decide to do so.