Dating an upperclassman
However, I am affected by this man’s actions on a daily basis. I met her during the first semester of my freshman year and we were absolute best friends.
We vented to one another, joked, went out on the weekends together, and talked about our dreams and aspirations.
“What do you mean you were raped—when, by who, why didn’t you tell me? He was someone relatively close to me: an upperclassman in my fraternity who I had conversed with in the past and thought to be a relatively pleasant and harmless guy.
But at a club meeting, I chatted with him a bit and afterwards thought that I might be interested in him. With my guy friends, the bills come and it’s usually a “I have this one, you get the next one.” But even that seemed a bit presumptuous to me.Let me start off by saying that I am the lucky one in this situation.I wasn’t sexually assaulted, I don’t have horrifying flashbacks of a man I despise lying on top of me, thrusting in and out of me against my will, and I don’t have panic and anxiety attacks when I hear his name. The opposite sex no longer had cooties and I actually willingly wanted to spend time with them. I was a cougar in those days– an upperclassman dating a freshman.I was nervous about my first kiss, and I didn’t understand the rules of this new thing called dating. But in late high school and in college, I understood dating. I knew how to make it clear to guys that I liked them. I was out of the dating game for almost three years in that relationship. When I first moved to Washington State, dating was still a thing I understood.
I don’t know if any of you have ever talked to a sexual assault survivor about their incident, but I had never seen my girlfriend like this.