How to sex chat
Especially when it’s about what we want from, and even during, sex. The willingness to talk about the kind of sex we have or want to have is a key skill.
Kate Mc Combs, a sex and relationships educator, points out, “When you avoid those vital conversations, you might avoid some awkwardness, but you’re also settling for suboptimal sex.” By having these conversations, you and your partner’s relationship can have emotional, psychological, and mental benefits.
If you ever feel sexually coerced by a partner, or forced to have sex or be touched in a way you don’t want to, know that your healthcare providers are always ready to help you.
You can talk to your doctor or a social worker about any concern you have.
Timaree Schmit, doctor of human sexuality, also suggests emphasizing the positive.
If you want to ask for less sex, you might try emphasizing their attributes to suggest new ideas.
Talk to a healthcare provider if you are worried something you want to try could be physically or sexually dangerous. “One of the barriers for communication is that the language is either really goofy-sounding or clinical,” says Emily Lindin of OMGYes, an organization focused on communicating about women’s sexual pleasure. Carli Blau points out, “Two partners who are sexually involved with one another ultimately want to pleasure each other.”Consider tapping into erotic stimulation from entertainment, if you still can’t find the words or time to say what you want.
So why not make sure the end result is what you both want and expected?From behaviors to billboards, suggestions of sex and sexuality filter into our lives.Yet having the vocabulary for sex doesn’t always translate so seamlessly into comfortable conversations.Read on to learn what Mc Combs and other experts recommend when approaching this intimate topic.Talking about these topics can also help build a foundation for a better relationship as you learn about each other and explore new things together, all while being on the same page.
Incorporate your concerns about yourself into the discussion.