Orthodox dating how far
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“You know what you’re attracted to, you know what you’re interested in; it’s tough for someone else to make those decisions for you.” As the gig economy creates increasing expectation for intensely customizable and immediately accessible services — from ride sharing to grocery delivery — questions about the usefulness of a standardized matchmaking system that involve less input on the part of the user continue to emerge.
And while Saw You At Sinai and its affiliates are traditional in their commitment to the importance of the matchmaker, their payment model — based on couples paying matchmakers directly upon a successful engagement — hews neatly to a model similar to Uber and other on-demand direct service companies.
“A single person looking for marriage is already limited by relying on others to help him or her out,” Ackerman told The Jewish Week via email.
“If I want an ice cream from the store, do I hire a middleman to introduce me to the ice cream? I will go to the store and pick out my own brand of ice cream with my favorite flavor at the right price. If you want action, then you’re best off doing it yourself.” The group has not yet led to any matches, but has over 90 members.
OU-JLIConnections uses campus Jewish educators who know the students as matchmakers rather than Saw You At Sinai’s randomly assigned shadchans.“We hope that students see this as another way we want to look out for them, and be involved in their lives.” OU-JLIConnections, which operates on 21 college campuses and serves nearly 4,500 students a year, was started at the initiative of Rabbi Reuven and Shira Boshnack, the OU-JLIC educators at Brooklyn College.When asked what this platform adds to existing options, Rabbi Boshnack emphasized “the personal touch.” He explained that “so much of the OU-JLIC programming is relationship-driven.Weinberg advocates for the value of having an “ombudsman” in the dating-for-marriage process.In contrast to what she characterizes as “environment of wandering,” created by apps in which daters keep seeking a more perfect person in an endless sea of possibilities and never allow a relationship to develop, a shadchan helps encourage communication and compromise to help a couple build a rapport.
(Saw You At Sinai matchmakers are not employees of the company with regular salaries, but are paid directly by clients only when they arrange a marriage; $2,000 is a standard fee.) As the gig economy creates increasing expectation for intensely customizable and immediately accessible services — from ride sharing to grocery delivery — questions about the usefulness of a standardized matchmaking system that involve less input on the part of the user continue to emerge.